Have you ever pondered why most people dread nursing homes? In all my years working with the geriatric population, I can honestly say I never met a nursing home resident who celebrated the day they were admitted to a skilled nursing facility.

I have heard from residents that they feel they were put in the home to die. No wonder the mere thought of nursing homes scares people!

Even a well-run nursing home that provides excellent medical treatment may forget to care for the human spirit. Let's look at the three plagues of nursing homes-loneliness, helplessness and boredom.

Loneliness is the pain we get when we want but do not have companionship. This can occur even when we are surrounded by people because we have not yet formed a relationship with any of the new people thrust upon us.

Helplessness is the feeling we get when we receive, but do not give care. Think of all the treatment that is provided to residents that still leaves them feeling empty because there is no one for them to care for in return. Inadvertently we have taken away their purpose for living.

Boredom is the feeling we get when our lives lack creativity and spontaneity. All nursing homes have scheduled activity programs, but they are pre-planned and predictable. Most of us want to do what we feel like doing on any given day based on our needs and desires of the moment, such as playing with a child, taking a dog for a walk, baking cookies or tending the garden.

There is good news! Life can be well worth living in a nursing home through a program called the Eden Alternative, and it is alive and well at SunBridge Pacific Care Center in Eureka.

The Eden Alternative was founded by Dr. Bill Thomas who wrote about it in his book, Life Worth Living in a Nursing Home. I am an Eden Alternative Associate and was fortunate to go to New York and receive my training from Dr. Thomas. Since then my goal at Pacific Care has been to create a "human habitat" which nurtures the human spirit and not just the human body.

This model fundamentally changes everything we do in our nursing home. It is not a program with a beginning and end, but rather a way of living. We are committed to surrendering the institutional point of view and making pets, plants and children the axis around which daily life unfolds for our residents. They continue to grow and learn as human beings.

The residents, their families, our volunteers and employees all work together to be sure that both the indoor and outdoor gardens are tended, that the dogs, cats, fish and birds have been fed and cared for

and that the children present are listened to and loved.

At SunBridge Pacific Care Center we provide care and not just treatment. Our success is measured by residents who had planned to go home but have found our human habitat so stimulating that they decided to stay with us long-term or residents who get well and go home but return whenever they need special care.

We frequently get comments from visitors that our facility is full of energy. "Of course," we say," people come here to live, not to die!"

If you cannot quite imagine what is going on, please come visit us. Staying connected with the community is also an important aspect of how we live at SunBridge Pacific Care Center.

Maxine Roby is administrator of SunBridge Pacific Care Center, 707-443-9767. She has created several Eden Alternative facilities including on-site child care centers.